Bulldog as CEO: Treatment of the Condition
In the most recent post, I described CEO Harry the bulldog, along with the impact his behavior had on his team, his family and everyone around him. And I promised the next post would describe what Harry tried to change his long-standing behavior; and his progress and lapses.
So, here goes. Harry came to realize his bulldog behavior limited is capacity and his career; de-motivating his best players; “training” others to avoid risks of taking ownership and expect to be “spoon fed” by him.
“Homework” Harry did for self-discovery and to change his beliefs and his behaviors:
Thought experiments (strictly mind exercises, alone in a quiet space):
– Yellow pad (fears, adverse consequences, history of fears)
– Mindset chart (current vs. future beliefs, actions and outcomes that vary with beliefs)
– Trigger identification (early, indelible experiences and current triggers of the same perceptions and emotions)
Field Experiments (actions in the real world of daily meetings and phone calls):
– Staff meeting and conference call changes (engage others in agenda-setting, have someone else lead meeting, get others to summarize discussion)
– 1-2-1 changes (do not go first, think self as mentor not boss)
– Centering: “count to 1 before you speak,” assess the emotion you are feeling, then ask a great open-ended question that makes people think)[1]
– Communication changes (time the duration of your own speaking intervals; speak in “packets” and stop; ask what others heard, then what they think; ask “how am I doing?”)
– Real time partnering: ask the most trusted direct report to signal you when you violate your own behavioral intent; ask for post-event feedback on your behavior)
* * * *
Everyone reverts at times to old behaviors. But Harry will tell you he is a different person most of the time. He sees positive outcomes with his family as well as at work.
Not long ago Harry had a relapse, reverting to some of the old behaviors. This time he recognized the pattern, deployed some of the learning from before and added a couple of new ones to make him stop, breathe, think, then act (see my earlier post on Lessons from Scuba for the CEO).
Adam Bryant’s interview i today’s NY Times with Mario Batali with the famous chef’s comment on “yellers” is consistent with my view.
This is just my view, what’s yours?
[1] In some cases, I have had CEO clients obtain from an expert source their Emotional Quotient profile
Tags: Behavior, emotion, emotional intelleigence, EQ, fears, Leadership, leadersip benavior, supervision
Sun, Aug 26, 2012
Coaching, Entrepreneur, entrepreneurship, Leadership Development, Small business, Supervision (managing direct reports), Uncategorized